Ah, the first of the year. The time for epic resolutions, new beginnings, and watching the relationships in my family devolve into petty squabbling over the TV remote. (Seriously, grownups?)
As it is the first of the year, I'm going to post my epic list of things I want to do in bed in the coming year. Other lists may follow soon, including the ten books I want to read in 2010, but this list has been formulating for a long time and gets priority. Greta Christina has a great list over at Blowfish of her sexual resolutions as well. Hers are more broad principles to apply, whereas mine are pretty specific. So without further ado, let me present to you--the list.
THINGS TO DO IN BED IN 2010
1. Sleep with a woman
This has been big on my to-do list since my sophomore year of high school, when I licked birthday cake off of the face of a six foot tall bisexual German Amazon. Now, thanks to Tim, it looks like it may actually happen.
2. Take the submissive role in a teacher-student roleplay
This is something I've wanted to happen for a long time; in fact, it was the first "kinky" thing I ever tried to talk someone into doing with me. It's high time it happened.
3. Fuck, and be fucked, in the ass
Tim and I have been dancing around this for a long time. It's happening, dammit.
4. Be worshiped.
This ought to be fun, in a practically vanilla kind of way. I want to be bathed, pampered, and fussed over, brought grapes and drinks and basically adored, all while being scornful and dismissive myself.
5. Do some medical roleplay
Rubber gloves, sponge baths, and maybe some "tests." Yes.
6. Make a porn.
What more explanation do you need?
7. Get more aggressive with hurting Tim
He can handle more, and I need to stop being such a wuss about it. Included in this is greater psychological suspense. He handled the last scene so well that I think I can definitely push him farther.
8. Get tied up and "molested."
We've played with this a little, but never for more than a few minutes. I'd like at least a half an hour of it.
9. Have semi-public sex of some kind.
A bathroom in a cafe? The pretty secluded roof of the building next to mine? Watch this space for further developments.
10. Go to at least one kinky or fetish event.
I'll probably be doing this one without Tim, because he's a pretty shy and private person, but I want to get out there and meet some other kinky people and see if there's something there for me. A good friend of mine has some contacts he's willing to help me explore.
And that's about it for my list. When Tim gets around to e-mailing me his, it'll go up too. Until then--imaginary readers, feel free to chime in with your lists for the new year, sexual or otherwise.
Showing posts with label The List. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The List. Show all posts
Friday, January 1, 2010
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Five Days: Or, The List Cometh, 2.0
I haven't been posting as much as I'd like, mostly because there's not that much to post. Spending the holidays with my folks means that I haven't seen Tim in way long, which means that my sex life is pretty much imaginary. The List, epic work that it is, continues to quietly grow in a document named 2010 Classwork. And I'm getting ready to see Tim in five days. My folks are dropping me off in my City, and I'm going to straighten out my apartment, see a few friends, and get started checking off the List items.
It's been a rougher month than I expected it to be, and I find myself getting pretty cranky over missing Tim--something which never really happened in other relationships. Over at Sugarbutch Chronicles (), Mr. Sinclair Sexsmith is giving his (her? hir?) girlfriend "homework", an interesting concept to me, especially since this summer, Tim and I might end up at opposite ends of the planet for a month or so.I hate the idea of us coming together only briefly during the summer, and finding in late August that we have no idea where we are sexually anymore. Being able to assign each other sexual tasks might make it easier to keep us on the same page, connecting our two (currently separate) sex lives in the same way that talking runs a thread between our daily lives.
None of this is stuff I've had to worry about in previous relationships, even long-distance ones, because they were held together mostly with old chewing gum anyway. Unhappiness was a standard feature. My past relationships were like rental cars; I just sort of assumed they could drive over anything. But with Tim, even scratching the metaphorical paint worries me--enough that I, incorrigible pedestrian, have resorted to car metaphors. The problem with having nice things is having to worry about them, which I hate, and take care of them--which, it turns out, is more pleasurable than I ever thought it would be.
So that's my state of mind. The List may be spiraling a little, as my fevered imagination throws things onto it that I'm not sure are possible. For example, getting fucked in the ass with a vibrator, which sounds fantastic in theory but which in real life may end in "ow, ow, no, ow..." But it's never hurt me before to set my sights a little high. Every time I've been a little ambitious--in my writing, in my classes, in my dating--it's been greatly rewarded.
It's been a rougher month than I expected it to be, and I find myself getting pretty cranky over missing Tim--something which never really happened in other relationships. Over at Sugarbutch Chronicles (), Mr. Sinclair Sexsmith is giving his (her? hir?) girlfriend "homework", an interesting concept to me, especially since this summer, Tim and I might end up at opposite ends of the planet for a month or so.I hate the idea of us coming together only briefly during the summer, and finding in late August that we have no idea where we are sexually anymore. Being able to assign each other sexual tasks might make it easier to keep us on the same page, connecting our two (currently separate) sex lives in the same way that talking runs a thread between our daily lives.
None of this is stuff I've had to worry about in previous relationships, even long-distance ones, because they were held together mostly with old chewing gum anyway. Unhappiness was a standard feature. My past relationships were like rental cars; I just sort of assumed they could drive over anything. But with Tim, even scratching the metaphorical paint worries me--enough that I, incorrigible pedestrian, have resorted to car metaphors. The problem with having nice things is having to worry about them, which I hate, and take care of them--which, it turns out, is more pleasurable than I ever thought it would be.
So that's my state of mind. The List may be spiraling a little, as my fevered imagination throws things onto it that I'm not sure are possible. For example, getting fucked in the ass with a vibrator, which sounds fantastic in theory but which in real life may end in "ow, ow, no, ow..." But it's never hurt me before to set my sights a little high. Every time I've been a little ambitious--in my writing, in my classes, in my dating--it's been greatly rewarded.
Monday, December 21, 2009
The List Cometh
I love lists. For all things. Last spring I realized that my list-making had gotten out of hand when I put "break up with boyfriend" on my schedule for the day and happily checked it off when I stopped crying. After that I backed off on lists for a while.
But now it's time for a kinder, although probably not gentler, list--things that my boy and I plan to do in bed for the next year. Of course, a good half of the list doesn't actually take place in a bed. I proposed the idea to him a few nights ago and he surprised me with a deluge of requests. I was going to keep the list to ten items, but it's grown way beyond that.
The list is going to keep growing until New Year's Day, when I'll post it and get started fulfilling its naughty demands. Thus far, most of the suggestions are things that don't really push our limits, just things that we haven't gotten around to yet. I think this may need to change. I think that part of the fun of doing exotic things in bed is pushing your partner's limits and your own, seeing if you can be just a little braver. I'm going to try to get him to have some sex out in the fresh air, or at least the semi-fresh air of my city. And I'm definitely going to start encouraging his dominant side. Although by the sound of some of the items on his list, he's already ahead of me on that.
In semi-related news, I found out from a friend that a friend of his, a charming dominant woman, is out looking for new submissives. I asked my friend if he'd make a recommendation that she play with me so that Tim could observe and pick some stuff up, and we're now awaiting a reply. I hope she says yes. This could be the hottest learning experience I've had since--well, since my Lit class last semester.
But now it's time for a kinder, although probably not gentler, list--things that my boy and I plan to do in bed for the next year. Of course, a good half of the list doesn't actually take place in a bed. I proposed the idea to him a few nights ago and he surprised me with a deluge of requests. I was going to keep the list to ten items, but it's grown way beyond that.
The list is going to keep growing until New Year's Day, when I'll post it and get started fulfilling its naughty demands. Thus far, most of the suggestions are things that don't really push our limits, just things that we haven't gotten around to yet. I think this may need to change. I think that part of the fun of doing exotic things in bed is pushing your partner's limits and your own, seeing if you can be just a little braver. I'm going to try to get him to have some sex out in the fresh air, or at least the semi-fresh air of my city. And I'm definitely going to start encouraging his dominant side. Although by the sound of some of the items on his list, he's already ahead of me on that.
In semi-related news, I found out from a friend that a friend of his, a charming dominant woman, is out looking for new submissives. I asked my friend if he'd make a recommendation that she play with me so that Tim could observe and pick some stuff up, and we're now awaiting a reply. I hope she says yes. This could be the hottest learning experience I've had since--well, since my Lit class last semester.
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